It is exactly as awkward as you’d imagine, at-least to start.
The background is that my good mate and I were looking for something new and exciting to do with our free time. Naturally, we thought of girls, in Friedrich Nietzsche’s words “…The most dangerous plaything.” But let’s not get too hung up on that crazy old codger. Don’t really feel like tip-toeing around his syphilitic ramblings. Its in this vein, that we decided to create a blind double date cook off. Us doing mains, them doing dessert. Our main, salmon tacos, the obvious first date choice. Their dessert, cold-set Oreo cheesecake.
The salmon taco thing may have sounded facetious. It was, but the more I think about it the truer it becomes. Think about it. Why drink, to cut through inhibition, no? However, this may be skewed data, cause we were blathered. All of us. Apparently meeting people is nerve wreaking. As we do, Bash and I didn’t plan the fish tacos in this vein. No, even to say plan would be a stretch. More like, “Fuck, the date is tonight. What should we make!”
That Initiated us leaving the bar, hence the state of blather-hood. Don’t worry, we can confidently say that we definitively didn’t not drive while we weren’t not under the influence.
The kicker being that we we’re now quite (read: very) late to our own party. In lieu of this, Bash drops me off at a nearby shop to grab some ingredients. Very much against his wishes, sending him off too break the ice. These 10 minutes, I have been told – and can believe – were some of the longest in his life.
With the Dutch courage of Willem Barentsz, I saunter in the front door straight into a wall of awkward tension. Not to be deterred. Drinks are poured, cheap bourbon if you’re wondering, and the stove is kicked into gear. Stilted conversation is held, awkward silences are endured. By the good grace of whatever deity doesn’t hold your superstition, eventually the mood lightens and the sheer ludicrousness of our predicament can be discussed. A situation confronted is half resolved, or some such thing.
Ah, finally we can begin to relax and actually enjoy one another’s company. The rest is history. Partly out of secrecy and, between you and I, partly because that’s where the story slips into the realm of the every day.